I got sent to a different library on Saturday. Even though it was quite busy people didn�t want anything. They were happy studying by themselves or using the computers. I spent the day sliding between feeling a little guilty about the lack of juggling 3 tasks at once and thinking well, yes, this is how it should be and chatting and looking at the weather forecast on the computer. Even though this library is only a couple of miles away nobody, not one single soul was aggressive, shouty or stupid. I can�t work out this phenomenon. How can people only a tiny area apart be completely different in temperament? My favourite moment was when Mrs P slipped away from her carer in Sainsbury�s, ran into the library and asked me to telephone her sister to come and pick her up straight away. She kept checking furtively over her shoulder to make sure her carer hadn�t caught up with her and her language seamlessly and continuously slipped between English and Gujarat. She then proceeded to pick up all the leaflets and put them down her top and before she left she looked round one last time, defiantly called out �BISCUITS!� and scarpered. Jo told me not to worry because someone always catches up with her in the end. RUN RUN fugitive Mrs P!

On Saturday night M and I went out for a meal and a few drinks. We didn�t get home that late but somehow managed to fall asleep and were woken by the sound of someone crashing through the front door. What�s worrying is that we weren�t actually meaning to go to sleep. We just sat down for about a minute and both looked up startled after an hour. This isn�t even the first time this has happened. Another occasion we were trying to watch a film and woke up with someone else in the room (which is a very disturbing way to be woken). I had just toppled forward from a sitting position and was elegantly resting on my forehead and he managed to sleep sitting upright with his head lolled back. We are Saturday night party animals, make no mistake.

Yesterday I had a haircut. I was trying to grow my hair long because I haven�t had lengthy hair (lengthy hair, haha) for about 10 years. Each time it gets half way there I get bored and have it cut, which is what happened yesterday. Although this time round was my biggest big hair achievement and now it is quite short and has gone a bit loopy and curly. There was a beautiful short hair equals easy washing realisation in the shower this morning. My brain knew it was gone but my fingers were questioning. Catch up fingers. Freakishly a bus arrived as I got to the stop and so I was at the hairdressers about half an hour early. Apparently the shops in this area do not open on Monday�s. What kind of shop doesn�t open on a Monday? Did my bus travel through time?

Or, according to the dates on my older links page it is I that is in an alternate time zone:

2004-07-21 - Oh I don't know. Always so much effort to come up with an older link thing.

2002-10-30 - A big crumpled heap

2002-10-29 - Hair

3204-07-16 - Shake Your Rump

3204-07-14 - Mean Owl

I love the bus. I haven�t gotten it for so long that daily bus journeys are in an almost forgotten part of my mind and the hordes of crazies and wankers are but a fond memory. I was not disappointed yesterday as I sat behind the Odd Couple on their way from the day centre. �We are meant to be engaged I am not ANGRY at you but you could have said MARIO I am going out with my mum ok MARIO. I could have plans! MARIO could have done something this evening MARIO could go out too but no because you don�t tell me. How are we meant to be engaged if you don�t tell MARIO?�

Last night in excitement of excitements my sister and I watched �101 things humans have had removed from themselves� sister programme �101 embarrassing sexual accidents�. This was slightly more gruesome, as in the case of the guy who got himself stuck in the rotating metal fan blades of a hoover engine. Funniest was the man who wanted do things to a melon. He warmed it first in the microwave and managed to get 2nd degree burns. It was so hot when he took it from the microwave that he had to wear oven gloves to carry it and yet��. And yet he still�� I mean, hello?

Oh god oh god. SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAM. My computer is driving me insane. It is throwing up security certificate messages and I just want to check that the things I am bidding on Ebay are still mine with 14 minutes to go. Fuck off certificate people, fuckofffuckofffuckoff. Right think logic; think Internet options tools��

Wanton and gratuitous violence

Accept

Explicit sexual activity

Accept

Provocative frontal nudity

Accept

Explicit or crude language

Accept

Right my computer now has exceedingly low standards in all areas of everything and it has let me view my goods and at last use Paypal. Hooray hooray for my immoral computer.

Oh shit. I have done something very bad involving the need for a password. Hmm at least I can use Word and look at things on my dektop lalala who needs to see things on the web anyway?

I think I should step away from the computer. BACK OFF GIRLFRIEND!

Inkysoso likes it like that