Maybe stamping myself with library date stamps was a really bad idea just before graduation day. I don�t think they are going to wash off. I know this because I tried to wash them off and I can clearly see 25th July 2004 as well as big black stripes across my hand. Secretly, I quite like how the ink has bled in to my skin. Close up it looks like pretty snowflakes. Dirty, pretty snowflakes. Ah, I almost added this entry and then remembered why I started to write about stamping myself. I gave in to peer-pressure and bought some decent black trousers to wear. I knew I would give in and wear this type of dressed up outfit because as much as I hate all this shit I will conform peacufully. It�s far easier to give in and get it over and done with. This is how I know that in a hostage situation I will go quietly. You should kidnap me. They were really expensive (back to the trousers) and I can wear them from now on to funerals/weddings/graduations/bar mitzvahs/court appearances etc. I have been to five funerals, zero weddings, zero bar mitzvahs and zero graduations and zero court appearances so far. Statistically, the odds are that these will be my funeral trousers. Dammit.

My grandmother�s funeral a year ago was a big Catholic affair. She was a devout Catholic. It was quite funny because I am not sure what went wrong but my family are either hippies or thugs and mostly stoned or drunk. There were an awful lot of us travelled down from all parts of the country and crammed in to a little church wearing assorted multicoloured outfits not knowing what to do and being generally the most awkward never been here before what is this place family to ever see the inside of a church. I think we all enjoyed the incense though. The funeral procession consisted of transit vans, people carriers and bashed up cars. My sister was wearing stilettos and tried to look innocent as she sunk into the earth as the coffin went down.

OK I am editing and editing here. I write things and then delete them and then write something mentioning I wrote something and deleted and then delete that because how LAME. It wasn�t especially poignant, even though my emotional depths are most eh deep so much so that if you were to stand in the deep end you would drown and be eaten by a shark. I have no idea why I even have to mention about the editing. I think I have problems. I can only get about halfway down a swimming pool before it is over my head. I am 5�3. It�s ok for all the 6�+ heroes.

I hate those little tiny flies that you occasionally get near your face. They don�t buzz, they waft. You know the really tiny ones that float about annoyingly. There is one near my keyboard that I am hitting but it comes back for more each time. Maybe it is into dominatrix.

Who has seen Shrek 2? Me! That is who. I liked Puss in Boots best. I also watched the whole first series of Black Books on DVD. It made me laugh a lot. It was the first time I used my DVD player all by myself, even though I have had a DVD player for about a year. I hardly ever watch films alone. I�m not sure why. I spend a lot of time reading. I have Spellbound to watch and I�m hoping it will be good because I have heard some hype about it.

Greece won Euro 2004. My area was street partying all night. It made it into national newspapers. Go my little cheery town! It has big national street party, dressed in togas and face paint dreams! But they are reality because Greece won and they hoorayed all night long and all day yesterday and plenty today too. It really is a cheery town because today I saw a box of cherries at a greengrocers that said �cheery box �4.99�.

Yesterday I worked all day long like a poor little donkey. This evening I am also working and tomorrow my boyfriend is coming here and we can spend the whole day pretending we are in Tekken 3 and I am Nina and he is Jin and wrestling and sleeping and having sex. Oh wait! I have to go to graduation and fall over when it is my turn to go up and faint and die. On a serious note, I will be so pissed off if I do die right now. Unless I do a Masters degree (which at some point in a few years I would quite like) I have finished education after about fifteen years and now I can get my ideal job as a Superhero Pirate and marry a Marine Commando and to die right now would make me violently angry. I know I will be dead so nobody would know how acutely raged I were but maybe the fact that the sky would be constant storms and the sea would turn red would be a clue.

Sometimes my work is so boring that it is almost funny. Yesterday I had to strict order a section of books on military type things. Some of the titles were �EXTREME TANKS� �EVERYTHING YOU EVER NEEDED TO KNOW ABOUT PARATROOPERS� �SURVIVAL IN EXTREME CONDITIONS� * I say almost funny because I can�t bring myself to wholly think it funny. I keep thinking I will be told off because I spend an inordinate amount of time reading the books and not doing work type things with them. For example yesterday I thoroughly read a book on celebrity body art, a cookery book about soup, six children�s picture books and the first few pages of a few fiction books. I know that it will catch up with me because whenever someone gets their wallet stolen or an off their face heroin addict starts rampaging around throwing shelves at people and high kicking the staff they check the CCTV. One time they saw one of the staff on a swivel chair and for fifteen minutes of fast forwarded tape the chair swivelled and swivelled faster, faster SPIN SPIN SPINNNNNNNN

* The caps locks are all my own because these titles have to be said in a military shout voice but the titles are 100% accurate and not made up.**

** Ok, maybe a little made up. M totally told me how to do the bullet points but it looked complicated and so I lied and said I liked the stars and purposely did stars because they are pretty ***

*** Sorry M, I do love you very much though

Inkysoso thinks you look hot and is inappropriately horny at work. She talks in the third person and needs icy water thrown all over her but actually she might quite like that and should really stop typing now